[Anah] Weeks 21 & 22: Firsts/Lasts

First Birthday Party:
James doesn't remember his first birthday party, but he does have photographs. A few of them are in the digital frame on his desk, the one that cycles the moments of his life. Later in life, it seems like the differences between him and his parents fade, but in that first picture, he looks like someone else's son entirely. He is smaller than he should be, a tiny golden-skinned boy with a glossy-black bowl cut. A pointed paper birthday hat is on his head, the only thing he has in common with the burly man and petite woman who flank him. They're smiling. He looks uncertain, puzzling at the camera.

Last Birthday Party:
James is helping blow up helium balloons for Bianca's party. It took him a while to get it the first time, but this is the fifth party he's done it for now—he ties off another balloon with an experienced twist and hands it off to Andrea. Bianca is holding court in the large dining room, instructing the party planners on where exactly to hang the glittering ribbons and where to place the chocolate fountain. He's not spoiling her, he reminds himself. He's teaching her some important life skills here, like organization and delegation. And he's going to keep telling himself that.


First Kiss:
As first kisses go, it's rather disappointing. Dry lips, sticky tongue, braces, and an audience. Spin the Bottle, James realizes, is nothing but another disease vector. So, he'll discover in a week, is Mary-Ellen. At least he comes away from the party with more than just a case of mono. He knows for sure that kissing girls doesn't do a damn thing for him. That doesn't stop him from kissing a few more once he's over the mono. But it takes another year for him to find someone really worth kissing.

Last Kiss:
James already knows this isn't going to work out. If it were, he'd have told Alex about the kids, about getting approved for their adoption and the impending visit. He kisses Alex goodbye as he gets out of bed. Alex is sleepy, lazy in the mornings—not fatherhood material, as he's always said.
   "I'll see you tomorrow night?" Alex pulls the covers up and rolls over onto his belly.
   "I'll call you." James keeps it non-committal.
Too bad he has no idea how long it'll be before he kisses anyone again—he doesn't kiss his one-night stands—because he might have kept that last date, just to get a couple more. Sex is easy to come by. Intimacy isn't.